Few more Funny SMS (Jokes)

Banta: What is the best way to see flying saucers? 

Santa: Pinch the waitress.

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Appu: Do you know that it is not fall that kills you, it is the sudden stop at the end.

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Pappu: When is it unlucky to see a black cat? . . . . . . . 

Appu: When you are a mouse.

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Whats d difference between ppl who pray in Temples and ppl who pray in Exam Centres? Those in d exam centres r damn serious.

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All of our politicians play KBC in reverse manner. They make crores and crores first and then answer the questions later.

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Appu: I have been trying to think of a word for two weeks. 

Pappu: Its a fortnight.

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Wife: Can u explain 2 me how dis lipstick got on ur collar? 

Husband: No,I really cant.I distinctly remembrd havng taken my shirt off.

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Lady: When you are finished with me, will my husband think I am beautiful? Beautician: May be, does he still drink a lot?

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Pappu to Appu: The planes are so fast these days that there is no time to get acquainted with the air hostess.

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Preeto: I won't marry you, and you know why? 

Jeetho: No, I can't think. 

Preeto: That's why.

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Santa Banta Jokes - 3

Crime Story 


"I'm going on vacation . Could you suggest a thrilling crime story ?"
Santa asks to Banta. "Here this one is so suspenseful you won't be able to
put it down" replies Banta. "only on the last page do you find out that
the gardener did it".

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New House 


Santa meets Banta
Santa: "so have you moved to a new house"
Banta: "No."
Santa: "Why not? You advertised to sell your old house, didn't you?"
Banta: "Yes, but when I read the ad, I realized it was just the home I was
looking for!".

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Father's Name


Tutor to Santa: wat is u r father's name.

Sanat: BEAUTYFUL RED UNDERWEAR. 

Tutor: R u joking? 

Santa: NO SIR! MY FATHERS'S NAME IS "SUNDER LAL CHADDHA" 

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Bomb


Santa Banta ko 3 live bomb mile.

Santa: Chal police ko de kar aate hain. 

Banta: Agar koi bum raste main hi phat gaya to? 

Santa: Jhoot bhol denge, ki 2 hi mile the. 

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Cinema


Santa Singh returned back from the cinema hall without watching the

cinema.what was the name of the cinema? 

Ans:NO ENTRY 

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Santa Banta Jokes - 2

Two programmers walk along the street.
The first says to another one, " Listen, people say that the software for a new american invisible plane, "Stealth-2" will be worked out by Microsoft"
The second m, " I think it is connected with the fact that a new plane must know how to hang up in the air "

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1st thief, "Police! Quick! jump out of the window!"
2nd thief, "But this is the 13th floor"
1st thief: "Hurry! This is no time to be superstitious"

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Museum administrator: That's a 500 year old statue you've broken.
Santa: Thank God! I thought it was a new one!

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Q: Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
A: They named him Sum Ting Wong

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A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?"
The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library."
So the blonde whispers, "Can I have a burger and fries?"

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Santa Banta Jokes

 1. One day a dog was running behind a Santa... But Santa was laughing.
     Banta asked, "Why you are so happy?
     He said... "Ah Ah Ah....I have an Airtel mobile with me...But Still Hutch network is following me.."

2.  What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination? 

     Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but "I never told them anything." 

3. Why do people seem to read the Bible a lot more as they get older. 

    They're cramming for their finals. 

4. What do you call Santa's helpers? 

    Subordinate Clauses. 

5.  What do you call a polar bear wearing ear muffs? 

     Anything you want. He can't hear you! 

6.  One day this black guy walks into a bar with this exotic, colorful parrot on his shoulder. 

     The man orders a beer and bartender asks, "Wow. That incredible. Where did you get him?" 

     And the parrot cocks his head back and says, "Africa man, Africa! Their all over the place!" 

7. Banta was amazed to find Santa playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a   while. 

  "I can hardly believe my eyes!" Banta exclaimed. "That's the smartest dog I've ever seen." 

  "Nah, he's not so smart," Santa replied. "I've beaten him three games out of five" 

8. Santa and Banta went to see 9-12 PM show. But they came back at 10 PM. Why?

   Because the movie's name was "Dastak" (Das-tak in Hindi means up till 10 O' clock) 

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